This day is almost arriving

This day will be when I will say with you bye. It’s over.

We already were cleary enough, you know what I want and I know what you want. Special because I am tired about what you have been doing. I really know what you do. We have discussed about it a lot of times, you always say the same and for me it’s always to improve myself, but what about you?

I know all the games you are playing, your attitudes, special because you do them almost in my front, imagine in my back, but you think you are hidden them. Sorry but this is the worst thing you can do.

I will not complain more about them, because I really get tired of it. You are always saying that you care about me, but it’s not true. You are hurtting me more than I am feeling loved with you. I will not say anything more until that day.

You want freedom, me too. A freedom to find someone or just enjoy my life when someone says ‘take care’ and really do it.

I really got in deep love with you, even sick I am able to do whatever I want. I will never give you execuses, because for you, as a love, you always have a priority, not more than me, but for things that I could move with my hands. I will do an effort for it, it will not matter about what.

All these times, we had a lot of amazing moments, I could be the best of myself. You did teach me a lot of things, I am super thank you for it. The most important thing, I found myself and I was able to love again. Love you.

This will happen soon, because the only things that I want are respect, honesty and be loved, no more love and benefits for you. Maybe for a miracle this will not happen, but do you believe in miracle? I don’t.

Or all of it was just a feeling that I was having, but I will remember all of them.

I wanted to be loved today

I woke up today with the desire to be loved, forgetting all the rules, standard and obligations I have everyday. I wanted to be in my bed, drinking a hot chocolate and watching a romantic comedy, like a matinee. It would be better if you were here, babe, with me by my side, making caress and warming me up with you.

Sometimes people get so obsessed they want to be independent, show that they are able to do everything by themselves, solve any kind of problem without asking any help, they end up forgetting how good it’s to have a day when they can be fondled and loved.

I don’t feel myself empty or needy, I am with someone who complements me, I also have friends and myself, but I would like to overflow my feelings of love today, saying how much I love you and listening how much you love me. It’s like a day when there was only me and you, as a fairy tale. well, why couldn’t we dream with fairy tales?

However if you couldn’t come today, I will love myself anyway and maybe I could wait for you in a next time when I wake up as today.

Love me and love you. <3

Quotes of my life

The first thing I always try to do when I wake up every morning, read some quotes. Because it gives me some inspiration and motivation for my day. It doesn’t matter it is about relationship, friendship, success or just a ‘Good Morning’, because just reading it makes me think and enjoy more my day and myself or remember a great moment.

These are some quotes I like:

To be honest with you, I don’t have the words to make you feel better, but I do have the arms to give you a hug, ears to listen to whatever you want to talk about, and I have a heart; a heart that’s aching to see you smile again. (Unknown)

You matter. You are important. You are loved and your presence on this Earth makes a difference whetter you see it or not. (Unknown)

The universe is a pretty big place. If it’s just us, seems like an awful waste of space. (Carl Sagan)

Most of them I read in Instagram, If you also want to read them, you can follow them.

iheartintelligence

thegoodquote

powerofpositivity

What inspires you?

xoxo

I miss you…

Eu sinto sua falta, a falta da sua companhia.

  • companhia para assistir os quase intermináveis episódios de alguma série
  • companhia para aguardar ansiosamente o próximo episódio
  • companhia para conversar por telefone ou vídeo que duravam horas
  • companhia para explorar o mundo
  • companhia para dividir aquela pizza e saber que o último pedaço seria meu
  • companhia para ir ao cinema, mas acabar dormindo no seu colo
  • companhia para pedalar sem destino
  • companhia para simplesmente deitar na grama e esperar a hora passar
  • companhia para lermos algum livro
  • companhia para dizermos o quanto tínhamos gostos musicais diferentes
  • companhia para cada selfie ser um brincadeira divertida
  • companhia para cada novo restaurante era uma careta nova
  • companhia para cada amanhecer havia um bom dia
  • companhia para nadar mesmo que fosse como um pato
  • companhia para não ter medo do novo
  • companhia para linha de código ter um teste
  • companhia para andar abraçados atrapalhando o andar na calçada
  • companhia para …

… simplesmente sermos companhia

“Não sei por que você se foi
Quantas saudades eu senti
E de tristezas vou viver
E aquele adeus não pude dar
Você marcou na minha vida
Viveu, morreu na minha história
Chego a ter medo do futuro
E da solidão que em minha porta bate

E eu
Gostava tanto de você
(Tim Maia)

Um breve relato

São 4:25 da manhã, você acorda e olha no relógio, se lembra que ainda pode dormir por mais 3h. Se vira cama, vira do outro lado, fica de barriga pra cima, olha para o teto e nada. Isso porque detou-se era quase 1:00, porém se sente como tivesse dormido uma eternidade e o corpo pesado. Alguns minutos passam, nada de voltar a dormir. Então se levanta vai à cozinha, toma um copo de àgua, observa por um tempo a janela, como a lua brilha lá fora e as árvores se mexem com o vento, fazendo aquele ruído entre a meia janela aberta. Dirigi-se ao banheiro, ascende a luz e a luminosidade parece atacar os olhos, que imediatamente parecem estar se ditalando. Senta-se na privada e faz um longo e calmo xixi. Enquanto lava as mãos, sente aquela água gelada esfriando a pele, mas em uma sensação de frescor. quando termina, olha-se ao espelo. Começa a notar alguns pêlos da sobrancelha fora do lugar, aquilo já lhe tira o estado de conforto, procura por uma pinça e tira-os. Observando mais um pouco, ve algumas pequeninas manchas vermelhas, como de pequenas espinhas, alguns pelinhos no nariz, a cara de bolacha, o cabelo que está crescendo mostrando-se como é originalmente, as olheiras que estão mais escuras que o normal, pois esqueceu-se de tirar a maquiagem antes de dormir. Tudo parece ter algo de errado, algo que incomoda, algo que não está dentro do padrão da percepção.